I feel rather like an idiot writing here, so I have created a blog for my more philosophical and intelligent thoughts (groundlingsup.wordpress.com) although that will not stop my childish rants here. Right now I am happy being who I am. Life is good.
Prom will be awesome now that I know the date, and also that I was asked (rather uneventfully) to the dance. My dress is just itching to get out of my closet and see some dancefloor and potentially dinner action. The theme is A Starry Night, and it will be very fun and cool. So excited.
My AP World History test also approaches. Ugh. And with that, I must go study.

So I've figured out my issues! (CLAP HERE) I know now that my problems with Christian's ex are all based on my intense need to protect him from everything that has ever hurt him, and she is on that list. So luckily for me, everything is gently fading into a happy montage of pictures of us backed by cheesy ninety's music. :) Life is good! The circus has left me with LOTS of bumps, bruises, and blisters! But other than my minor injuries, I am looking forward to a cool Triple Trapeze performance in a week and a day. Not long, but we can totally make it work. I made a new friend named Steven, who likes boys. I have surrounded myself with loving, wonderful friends and I am ready to take on the world! So many good decisions this week. Calling the ex by her first name and not the rather rude nickname we have for her (it's actually a story, so...technically it's not that rude), making up with some old friends who I've had issues with, and otherwise just being kind to others in general. That's what God calls us to do. YEAH BUDDY.
I'm out.

I'm fine. 
I tell myself that a lot lately, even though I really know I'm not on the inside. Every teenager does it within their span of actually being a teen. We get so disillusioned by our 'being fine' that eventually that's what we become. Not particularly happy, not really all that sad. Sometimes I just float in the middle and pretend that I'm the happiest girl in the world. I have Mia, who is such a wonderful person. I have Christian, who is loving and kind. And I have Steve and Liam, who protect and take care of me like no brother ever has before. I love and appreciate all of them; but sometimes I just smile for their sake when I'm dying on the inside. I can't tell Christian cause he'll get worried and that's the last thing he needs. Then there's Mia, who has issues of her own, same with Liam and Steve.
I'm sure one or two of them will eventually read this.
But don't worry guys, I'm fine. 
(I'll Try - Jonatha Brooke)

Literally! I'm running away with the circus! I'm off to have some grand adventure with Starfish Circus, which will be visiting my school a second time this year! Last year I had a super fun time doing contortion and floor acrobatics. I'm hoping that this year I will get to do something in the air, like silks or hoops.
There's not a feeling in the world like the one you get out of an intense 2 hour workout every day after school for two weeks. I will have a rocking summer body if I keep up the work even after they leave (it's hard not too, because it makes you feel awesome). Plus I'm about to become a bendy straw in two weeks. It takes about three days for my nic